Inspirations for June


1) My spoon is too big.
2) Nothing is the same anymore.
3) It's impossible to make everyone happy without hurting someone's feelings.
4) Welcome to my world.
5) It's bright/dark outside.
6) I don't want any part of this.
7) Everybody needs a job, but only because we've forgotten how to hunt.


1) Hunger
2) Exhaustion
3) Sire
4) Minion
5) Love
6) Lust
7) Hate


war, or whatever you think of

Passion, or whatever you think of

, or whatever you think of

, or whatever you think of

Danger, or whatever you think of.

, or whatever you think of

, or whatever you think of


1) Put yout lights on: Santana
2) If I close my eyes forever: Ozzy & Lita Ford
3) It's my life: Bon-Jovi
4) Fucking Perfect: Pink
5) Dancing Queen: Abba
6) Breathless: The Corrs
7) Heart Attack and Vine: Tom Waits


1) What/Where did you want to be when you grew up?
2) Do you remember your first crush?
3) What was the most important thing you've ever lost/found?
4) Are you happy?  Why or why not?
5) Are you a affectionate/sexual person?
6) What skils/talents are you most proud of?
7) Did you ever walk out on a job?

1) “I'm sorry for everybody in the world, I guess.”  - Rain : 1932
2) "It's good to be home."  - Come Back, Little Sheba : 1952
3) "I've always relied on the kindness of strangers." -  Streetcar Named Desire : 1951
4) "I saw her. I know that I saw her."  - Les Diaboliques : 1955
5) "That's probably a good idea.”  - Pulp Fiction : 1994
6) "Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you." - The Matrix : 1999
"Nothing lasts forever, my king. That is the destiny of all kingdoms." - The Scorpion King : 2002

Inspirations for May

1) My teeth hurt.
2) I hate the dentist.
3) I have a crush.
4) I'm addicted to my social-network
5) I hate social networks.
6) I can't drive without my cellphone.
7) This closet is too dark.

1) Ash
2) Ambush
3) Boom
4) Crash
5) Date
6) Force
7) Fire



Lynx, Fantasy

Volcano, Disaster


Biplane, Flying

Bugs, Insects, Disgusting

Emergency, Hospitals


1) Stairway to Heaven: Led Zeppelin
2) Johnny be Good : Chuck Berry
3) House of The Rising Sun: The Animals
4) Born to be Wild: Steppenwolf
5) Piece of My Heart: Janis Joplin
6) That's Life: Frank Sinatra
7) Burma Shave: Tom Waits


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1)  What is your dream-date?
2)  Do you have a favorite dog?
3)  What was your worst bad dream?  What was your favorite dream?
4)  How will the world end, with a bang, or a whimper?
5)  Which do you prefer, cars or trucks?
6)  Is flying still the safest way to travel?
7)  Which would you prefer, a boy, or girl?

1) "I feel as though I'd lived through all of this before in another life." - The Philadelphia Story : 1940
2) "Some fun – and adventure at last!" - The Thief of Bagdad : 1940
3) "If you love someone deeply enough, anything is possible. Even - miracles?" - Brigadoon : 1954
4) "I know, we eat, we sleep, we rest, and soon we be all better again." - The Far Country : 1954
5) "
I'll be back; don't you forget that. I'll be back." - On The Waterfront : 1954
6) "They abide and they endure." - The Night of The Hunter : 1955
7) "Did you hear what I said? I absolutely adore you." - The Apartment : 1960


Things I have lost.

Backdated, (OOC sorry took me so long, but things got crazy and I forgot)

Things I have lost, well, possibly the hunger...well, that is not entirely true. The hunger to kill, the addiction to kill for a sexual thrill is still there. I love to hunt, I love to find my prey, but I no longer feel the need to kill them off. True, the person/s I go after are always someone I could love, or bed. Oh, they could be such a luscious, and intense sensation, and I do miss it. I miss it when I am hurting, when I am angry, frustrated, my pregnancy hormones are acting up, making me horny and unable to satisfy myself. I could easily go out and find the people I have been stalking, like I would a buck, or doe. I could walk into their home, and make myself feel so intensely satisfied. Except, being in love has changed this, it has shifted my purpose, my needs, my ideals. The fact that I want them, want them in the worst possible of ways. I want to make them pant, gasp, and scream for me. It is so similar to what I can achieve with some break in tools, and a gun. That look on their faces when I am going to take their lives, it has changed to the look on his face when I know he is going to come. I pour all my feelings, needs, and wants into this relationship.

Do I still yearn? Oh yes,. Do I still hunt, yes, I catch myself. Instead of carrying it out though, I go home and kiss my man, and channel that hunger into the life, breath, need, want, and intensity of that moment shared with him. There is no death, unless you count all the tiny deaths that might occur, but in the end, there is no blood, no shame, no anger, no pain. I've lost the need, the kill.
True Form

Who I Serve...

The answer to this question was once as simple as I was powerful. Know that I was once a god to other gods. They once danced about before me and constructed altars hoping this would please me, and prevent my anger from reaching out and ending them with but a thought. My reach was endless; the sky, the landscapes, mountains and oceans were once subject to my will whenever it suited me to change them. Who I served was the only thing held in common with the muck at my feet. Any who knew to stand and plead for their lives were in service only to one being. They wished to serve me almost as much as I wished to serve myself, and only because in my time there was nothing greater for me to look up to and marvel at.

My power is eternal, and yet answers for questions are ever changing as time has it's way with us. I have felt love for one who might have only provided some measure of amusement when I was still king. The weakest of this kingdom has proved himself the most resilient, and it is him and his subjects I now serve. This service will continue as long as he does.

It is what my heart demands, and I am now its willing slave.

Two in One

Don't much matter none where we're going. We're already home, and where we're ever going is only a 'next stop' in a continual quest to keep things moving. Who we serve is us and ours. We're a family, my estimate. Alliance keeps stretching out further and further every year, so we're just going to keep moving that much further ahead. Might be sad for some, empty for others. Ain't for everybody, this life. Suits me fine. Life isn't sad oe empty. Well, wouldn't know if it was anyhow.

Too damned busy.
happy flirty, amusement, Giddy, smiles, happy

You...are in love?

Never thought it'd happen to me actually. Came close a coupla times, or at least, close for me. When it comes down to it though, always thought I'd be doin it alone. I'm used to that and I'm pretty good at it. Never thought too much about bein happy- I've gotta lot to atone for, figured I'd be busy with that. You keep yourself busy fightin the good fight, or hell, just fightin and you don't have time to miss what you never had, y'know?

I didn't even know what I was feelin- haven't had a lot of practice. Everyone knows the shit that's gone down since I woke up a slayer. What happened before that wasn't a whole lot different- just less in your face. Love's never been a part of my life- least, not that I can remember. Makes it a whole lot harder to see it when it comes.

So Ron said he loved me. I can't tell you how freaked out that made me. Guy like him....loving a damaged gal like me? He's got to be needin some therapy, but I'm not pushin him to see a doc. Kinda like seeing myself through his eyes, it makes me want to be what he sees. Not sure where we'll end up or how far it'll go. Lorne says we're in this for the long haul- Yeah...I admit it. I was a chicken shit and asked. It's not like my past would make anyone think loving me is a good idea- and who can blame em? I cut myself a path to hell through the few people who wanted to be my friends...

Right...kind of wandered off the thought path there, I guess. But to answer the question? Yeah, I'm in love. It kinda snuck up on me. Knew it for sure when I thought Ron was dying. I'd never felt that lost, scared or....empty before. And I've made a life out of empty. Scared doesn't happen often- you gotta care to feel fear. Care if you live or die or care if someone else does. Never worried about the first really and rarely the second. I care now....and it scares the shit outta me.
Troubled, Concerned, Determined, Dark, Quiet

I Don't Know if Something Has Happened.

Last night, something frightening took place.
I left my room at The Hyperion on my way to go out and make rounds, but felt the all too familiar sensation that came with losing my soul again. That was bad enough, and I was floored by it. Literally; I fell to my knees, but was then belted yet again by the abrupt return of my soul before Angelus could even get back to his feet. Now I'm terrified. What am I supposed to do? When Ron Snyder told Buffy he and Faith were going to Ireland to speak with Romani about removing the curse they put on me all those years ago, I was furious, and for good reason. He told Buffy this in the hopes she'd wake up from the coma she put herself in, and I didn't think it was right he would try to get Buffy's hopes up over something others have tried before and failed. But, but last night? Did it really happen? Spike has his soul back without needing a curse, so I knew it was possible, but Angelus was cursed. I'm the product of this curse, and I've long since gotten used to believing I'd never know perfect happiness again. What happened back there? Did it... I already asked this. Are Buffy and I going to know perfect happiness again because of something Snyder's accomplished?

I don't know what I should do at this point.
I really don't want to have to thank that insufferable bastard...
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Late Night at Caritas

"The piano has been drinking.
My necktie is asleep.
and the combo went back to New York.
The jukebox has to take a leak 
Cause t'carpet needs a haircut.
And the spotlight looks like a prison break
And the telephone's out of cigarettes
As usual the balcony's on the make
And the piano has been drinking, heavily
The piano has been drinking
And he's on the hard stuff tonight"

"The piano has been drinking
And you can't find your waitress
Even with the Geiger counter
And I guarantee you that she will hate you
From the bottom of her glass
And all of your friends remind you
That you just can't get served without her
The piano has been drinking "

"The piano has been drinking
And the lightman's blind in one eye
And he can't see out of the other
And the piano-tuner's got a hearing aid
And he showed up with his mother
And the piano has been drinking
Without fear of contradiction I say
The piano has been drinking"

"Our Father who art in ?
Hallowed by thy glass
Thy kindom come, thy will be done
On Earth as it is in the lounges
Give us this day our daily splash
Forgive us our hangovers
As we forgive all those who continue to hangover against us
And lead us not into temptation
But deliver from evil and someone you must all ride home"

"Because the piano has been drinking
And he's your friend not mine
Because the piano has been drinking
And he's not my responsibility"

"The bouncer is this Sumo wrestler
Kinda cream puff casper milk toast
And the owner is just a mental midget
With the I.Q. of a fencepost
I'm going down, hang onto me, I'm going down
Watch me skate across an acre of linoleum
I know I can do it, I'm in total control
And the piano has been drinking
And he's embarassing me
The piano has been drinking, he raided his mini bar"

"The piano has been drinking
And the bar stools are all on fire
And all the newspapers were just fooling
And the ash-trays have retired
And I've got a feeling that the piano has been drinking
It's just a hunch
The piano has been drinking and he's going to lose his lunch
And the piano has been drinking
Not me, not me, The piano has been drinking... not me."

--Tom Waits
Holly Two &amp; Three Quarters

Who Am I... As if I Need An Introduction.

Name's Holly.
I'm a twelfth-generation hologramatic ship-board computer, with an IQ of six thousand. This is equal to the collective IQ of six thousand employees from your local department of motor behicles. Gordon Bennet, you think the laws of time and space don't apply here in the Hub? You should sit over at the DMV for a spell, shouldn't you. Anyway, it isn't the size of the IQ that matters, is It; it's how you use it,

Who Am I?

Does this really matter any longer?
My name is Helena Russel. I am a medical doctor serving on Moon-Base Alpha, and I have been propelled away from the planet of my birth; my family is millions (or maybe even billions) of kilometers away from me, and the man I am in love with is also the man I am least likely to form a relationship with. I offer medical care for the crew, but only because it was what I was hired to do. I care about these people, but only because I took an oath when I became a doctor. Oh, I am very good at my job, but is it wrong for me to want more? Do I want more only because it's now permanently out of my reach? My current dissatisfaction is not unique on Alpha, so I don't feel all that bad about it. I am Doctor Helena Russel, and I'm currently unhappy with my life.